I’m sitting at the dining room table in my new home, amongst my new family, attempting to write, while activity swirls around me. My dog, Maxx, is chasing the cat, Mittens. The family is chatting about last night’s dreams, making lunches for school and work while eating breakfast. I’m getting ready to take Walter to work and Abigail to school, then get in a bike ride, plan the week’s meals, and make calls about building a fence for the dogs, before I face more box unpacking.
My ‘office’ is still in boxes in the basement. The past month has been full of getting to know new family and husband, unpacking, sorting, prioritizing, making thousands of decisions every day about ‘stuff’: We have two blenders—Do we need two of them? Which one do we keep? Will an adult child want one, or do we give it away?
Some precious things I’ve caressed wistfully one more time as I put it in the car to donate elsewhere—like Grandmother’s lamp table where we played cards together when I was a child. Dishes that were once special but no longer needed. Once-beloved trinkets that no longer seem to belong.
Between us, we have four sets of china. Who needs that many dishes? Even though they were all passed down through the generations, decisions need to be made.
Walter had a seizure two days before we got married. Doctors are still running tests to determine the cause, and recently the doc said we probably will never know why. In the meantime, he cannot drive and he’s dealing with being dependent on me as his chauffeur, as well as side effects of the meds prescribed. The upside to this is we get to spend a lot of time in the car together. I am quickly learning the roadmap of my new Wisconsin region. Our unity is growing as we are being tested on all fronts in patience and determination.
Weird things keep happening . . . a car engine blew, on our wedding day. Plumbing and A/C broken, along with other things. Our health insurance somehow got accidentally cancelled (but that is fixed now). My old dog Ziggy went totally deaf the day we loaded up the moving truck. She is also mostly blind and having to contend with stairs in our new home.
Every day I spend time changing my name and address on accounts, in hundreds of places! A few changes go smoothly, but on average I have to upload ID and documents twice or more for the update to ‘take’. A new turnover sometimes requires great determination to make things stick.
All this too, while I try to work and keep up with clients and website and meetings, discovering new venues to expand my business and influence here in Wisconsin.
These are not ordinary daily tasks, but ones that come with a huge life change. I’ve experienced a Grand Upgrade in my life. I made my choice to marry into a new family and uproot from Texas to move into Wisconsin, with absolutely no regrets.
But even the most thrilling changes can be stressful, right? Learning curves always are, even in the very best situations. And, I have a new best friend and strong husband to walk alongside me to help steady me and discern with me. What a sweet blessing!
I’ve got boxes yet to unpack. Furnishings yet to find their location (whether it is in this house—or given to another). New routes and routines to discover and settle into. New hairdresser, doctor, pharmacy, new everything. And I get to deal with it all through new eyes, new attitudes. NEW BEGINNINGS.
And, there is lots of trash. Goodness! How did we accumulate so much STUFF? It feels good to pare down, streamline, and blend two households, bringing simplicity and order, but it takes time to weed through it all.
Same thing with mindsets and beliefs and emotional ‘triggers’ that no longer apply. It’s hard, but quite rewarding to identify, unpack, and ditch THAT baggage! I’m transitioning from single person to a married mindset. What a pleasure to begin to realize that the ground beneath me is firm, I’m loved and trusted, I have a beautiful new life and family to nurture and blend along with what’s always been mine since the beginning.
I may never be finished with boxes and blending—physical, emotional, spiritual. Maybe I never want the ‘sorting’ to be DONE. It’s always good to re-examine and deal with our ‘boxes’, to unpack our STUFF, to sort and shift, to blend old treasures with the new ones, or sometimes totally releasing what was in the past so that our hands are free to embrace what is coming.
I remind myself that upheaval is good.
Change is uncomfortable. Yet, it is amazingly exhilarating at the same time if we choose to see the potential freedom from unwanted, limiting structures that could hinder us from soaring to amazing and unfamiliar horizons. Sometimes it feels good to say, “I’ll take whatever today delivers and enjoy the process, no matter what.”
What challenging change is on your plate today that could become a sweet blessing if accompanied with an attitude adjustment?
Boxes and Blending and Benefits of Change